Tag Archives: WOW! Women on Writing Book Tour

The Writing Life, WOW Women on Writing Blog Tour and Giveaway

Author Attitude: What Is It and Why Do I Need It? WOW Women on Writing Book Tour with Nina Amir

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Posted by Kathleen Pooler/@kathypooler with Nina Amir/@NinaAmir

 

“Success as a writer has always been a matter , in large part, of plain old hard work. But also smart work–knowing what to do and how.” Novelist James Scott Bell, from  the Foreword, The Author Training Manual.

 

I am very pleased to participate in Nina Amir’s WOW, Women on Writing Book Tour for her new book, The Author’s Training Manual. Nina has some very interesting advice about succeeding as an author by following WOOT! I hope you enjoy hearing about this as much as I did.

 

My book reviews can be found on Amazon, Goodreads, Shelfari and LibraryThings

 

Welcome , Nina!

 

NinaAuthorPic
Author Nina Amir

 

 Author Attitude : What Is It and Why Do I Need It?

In the publishing world, it’s hard to predict what book will succeed. It’s a bit easier to know if an author will achieve success. Maybe one has more writing talent while another has superior ideas. Yet other might be a phenomenal marketer. More than likely, you’ll find that successful authors, much like successful people in almost any industry, have one thing in common: a successful attitude.

 

Attitude Affects Results

 

You might have heard the saying, “Your current habits have only helped you achieve your current level of success. To achieve a higher level of success, you must change your habits.” To do that, you need to change not only your behavior but also your underlying attitude.

 

Your attitude, which is based upon your beliefs, thoughts or ideas about a thing, experience or situation, affects your behavior, or how you choose to act.  Your actions then determine your results. Thus, to change your actions you might have to change your corresponding beliefs, thoughts, or ideas.

 

When it comes to writing a book, if you aren’t achieving the results you want, you must examine your attitude about writing and publishing a book. When you change your attitude, your results will change as well.

 

That doesn’t mean you don’t still need a good idea and good writing. You do, but your attitude will help you attain your goals in any area as you work toward successful authorship.

 

For example, if you have the attitude that you can only write when the mood hits, and the mood doesn’t hit often, you won’t get your book written quickly. Your attitude likely is based on beliefs that writers write when inspired. That belief might come from thoughts that you need to wait to feel inspired before you can write well. A more productive thought might be “I get inspired by writing daily on a schedule.” If you take action on that thought, you might find yourself getting inspired and believing that you can write well whenever you sit down at the computer. You may start writing daily and producing inspired results. Your attitude about how and when you write will change.

 

The same could be true of building author platform, for instance. If your attitude is that you hate author platform building, you won’t spend time on it, or when you do, that time won’t be productive. If you explore the beliefs and thoughts that create your attitude, you might discover some that sound like “It’s a time sink” and “It takes me away from writing.” You could change your attitude to: Platform building helps me succeed as an author, so I embrace this activity and do it willingly and with enthusiasm. Your thoughts would need to change as well, to something like: “I build author platform effectively” (Learn how!) and “Platform building helps the books I write get read.” As you change your thoughts and beliefs, your attitude will change, as will your results.

 

Author Attitude—The Four Elements

 

Here are the elements I believe make up a successful “Author Attitude.”

 

1. Willingness

 

To succeed as an author generally takes an enormous amount of willingness. To succeed as a self-published author takes even more.

 

·         You must be willing to do whatever it takes.

·         You must be willing to do more than just write.

·         You must be willing to change.

·         You must be willing to learn new things.

·         You must be willing to step outside your comfort zone.

·         You must be willing to make mistakes

·         You must be willing to take risks.

·         You must be willing to fail.

·         You must be willing to succeed

·         You must be willing to play big and be seen.

·         You must be willing to get rejected.

·         You must be willing to run your own publishing company.

 

2. Optimism

 

Studies show that optimists succeed more often than pessimists. Optimists don’t take rejection, criticism and mistakes personally, which helps them avoid getting stuck. Optimistic people approach challenges as opportunities to move closer to their goals. Pessimistic people see them as obstacles, or reasons to quit.

 

3. Objectivity

 

Writing and publishing requires the objectivity to see yourself and your work from a different perspective than your own, such as:

 

·         the reader’s perspective

·         an editor’s perspective

·         a publishing professional’s perspective

 

When you can do this, you can take the necessary steps to improve your work and make yourself into an attractive publishing partner.

 

4. Tenacity

 

Writing a book isn’t easy. It’s often said that the real work of a writer begins after publication when you begin promotion. You must have determination, persistence and perseverance—all elements of tenacity—to get from aspiring to published (and successful) author.

 

WOOT!

 

To easily remember the elements of an Author Attitude, I created an acronym: WOOT. According to the Urban Dictionary, the word “woot” originated as a hacker term for root, or administrative,  access to a computer. It works well when applied to the topic of attitude because to change your attitude you must access your “computer”—your mind.

 

These days WOOT is used simply as a term of excitement.

 

If you and your book succeed by whatever definition you choose you will have reason to shout, “WOOT! WOOT!”

 

About the Author

 

Nina Amir, author of How to Blog a Book: Write, Publish, and Promote Your Work One Post at a Time and The Author Training Manual: Develop Marketable Ideas, Craft Books That Sell, Become the Author Publishers Want, and Self-Publish Effectively, transforms writers into inspired, successful authors, authorpreneurs and blogpreneurs. Known as the Inspiration to Creation Coach, she moves her clients from ideas to finished books as well as to careers as authors by helping them combine their passion and purpose so they create products that positively and meaningfully impact the world. A sought-after author, book, blog-to-book, and results coach, some of Nina’s clients have sold 300,000+ copies of their books, landed deals with major publishing houses and created thriving businesses around their books. She writes four blogs, self-published 12 books and founded National Nonfiction Writing Month, aka the Write Nonfiction in November Challenge.

 

To learn more about Nina, visit www.ninaamir.com. Get a FREE 5-Day Become a Published Author Series from her when you click here.

 

 

Title: The Author Training Manual: Develop Marketable Ideas, Craft Books That Sell, Become the Author Publishers Want, and Self-Publish Effectively


Author: Nina Amir

Genre: Writer how-to

 

Publisher: Writer’s Digest Books


Publication Date: March 18, 2014

Paperback: 248 pages


Synopsis:

Anyone can publish a book and become an “author,” but if you want to become a successful author with a profitable publishing career, you need a clear, step-by-step guide to help you develop book ideas that sell. In The Author Training Manual, expert editor and book coach Nina Amir reveals the exact process successful authors have used to create business plans and proposals for their books and teaches you how to view your ideas through the eyes of acquisitions editors and literary agents.

 

Whether you write fiction or nonfiction, plan to traditionally publish or self-publish, The Author Training Manual provides you with the tools you need to achieve your goals and become the author publishers want. Inside you’ll find concrete steps, evaluations, sample business plans, in-depth training activities, editor and agent commentaries, and much more–all designed to help you stand out, from the slush pile to the shelf.

NinaBookcover
Author Training Manual by Nina Amir

 

Just Thought You Should Know:

 

The Author Training Manual will also be having a WOW Social Media Tour this summer. On June 30, we’ll be having a review and giveaway of The Author Training Manual on the Muffin. So don’t forget to tell your readers they’ll have another chance to win a copy on June 30.

 

Author’s Websites:                

Nina Amir’s website:

http://ninaamir.com/

 

Nina Amir’s blogs:

http://ninaamir.com/blogs-and-columns/

 

Nina Amir’s Facebook:

InspirationToCreation

 

Twitter: @NinaAmir

 

How about you? Do you have the WOOT it takes to be a successful author?

 

Nina has graciously agreed to give away a copy of the Author Training Manual to a commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing.

 

We’d love to hear from you. Please leave your comments below~

 

Next Week:

Monday, 6/09/14: “My Journey of Defeating Fear to Help Others by Memoir Author Pamela Koefoed.”

 

 

Coping with Loss, Memoir, Miscarriage and Stillbirth

Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Loss: WOW! Women on Writing BookTour and Giveaway of Bringing in Finn by Sara Connell

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Posted by Kathleen Pooler/@kathypooler with Sara Connell/@saracconnell

 

“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Winston Churchill

 

I am very pleased to be participating in WOW!Women on Writing’s Book Tour and Giveaway of  Bringing in Finn by Sara Connell. My book reviews can be found on Amazon and Goodreads.

Sara will share her inspirational and heartfelt journey through an extraordinary surrogacy experience in this guest post on ” Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Loss.”

 

BringinginFinnPaperback!!
Bring in Finn Book Cover by Sara Connell

Book Description:

In February 2011, 61-year-old Kristine Casey delivered the greatest gift of all to her daughter, Sara Connell: Sara’s son, Finnean. At that moment, Kristine—the gestational carrier of Sara and her husband Bill’s child—became the oldest woman ever to give birth in Chicago.

Bringing in Finn is the incredible story of one woman’s hard-fought and often painful journey to motherhood. In this achingly honest memoir, Connell recounts the tragedy and heartbreak of losing pregnancies; the process of opening her heart and mind to the idea of her 61-year-old mother carrying her child for her; and the profound bond that blossomed between mother and daughter as a result of their unique experience together.

Moving, inspiring, and ultimately triumphant, Bringing in Finn is an extraordinary tale of despair, hope, forgiveness, and redemption—and the discovery that when it comes to unconditional love, there are no limits to what can be achieved

 

Author Bio (from Amazon Author Page):

Sara Connell is an author, speaker and life coach with a private practice in Chicago. She is a frequent contributor in the media and has appeared on Oprah, NPR, WGN, FOX News Chicago- upcoming: Good Morning America, Nightline an The View. Sara’s writing has been featured in: Elle Magazine, Good Housekeeping, Parenting, Psychobabble, Evolving Your Spirit and Mindful Metropolis magazines. Her first book- Bringing in Finn; an Extraordinary Surrogacy story- nominated for Book of the Year 2012 by Elle Magazine- is Sara’s first book. (Sept 4, 2012 Seal Press)

Author Contact information:

 

Product Details from Amazon:

  • Hardcover: 336 pages
  • Publisher: Seal Press (August 28, 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1580054102
  • ASIN: B00BJYM6IU

 

Welcome,Sara!

 

Sara Connell Head Shot
Memoir Author Sara Connell and Finn

 

Coping with Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Loss

At some point during the seven-year journey I took to have a child, I started to think that people who had experienced fertility issues and reproductive trauma were like war veterans. One person may have landed in Normandy on D-Day, another shot at while flying Catalina patrol planes in the South Pacific, but they had all fought in WWII.

One day, on one of the rare occasions that I lifted my gaze from the magazines I always tried (unsuccessfully) to read in the waiting room of the “high-risk” OB, I made eye contact with a patient across the waiting room and we traded stats. Me: “six rounds IVF, miscarriage, incompetent cervix, stillbirth.” She (an attractive woman about my age with a blazing smile and creamy caramel skin): “spontaneous aborter more than three miscarriages in succession, incompetent cervix, preeclampsia).” Our experiences were different, but we knew—like the soldier who was sent in to liberate Auschwitz but didn’t go to Dachau—that the pain, the shock, the trauma, was the same.

For almost seven years, I carried shame and despair inside my body.  The weight felt the size of a bowling ball or one of those steel bombs that are lit with a fuse and explode in classic Warner Brothers cartoons. I didn’t understand that speaking about the trauma, the grief, the pain could be healing and that connecting with other people who had walked the trip wire-laden path of infertility was a way to set me free. 

Since writing a book about my fertility experience and the miraculous way my son came into the world (my sixty-year-old mother carried him as our surrogate), I’ve been asked more than once what advice I would give to someone in the midst of a fertility experience. The first time I fielded this question, I felt reticence.  So many things people said to me during my own experience were unhelpful—or hurtful (“everything happens for a reason”, “this must have been God’s will”). But I felt I should say something, so I answered by sharing my favorite of the responses I received from friends after they heard our twins had been stillborn:

“Oh god, that completely sucks.”

And the runner-up: “I am sorry you are going through any of this—you definitely do not deserve it.”

When pressed in one interview to offer more, I came up with three things that helped me heal and keep going:

1)     Healing: For me, this involved trauma therapy, yoga, meditation, massages, crying, grieving, staying off Facebook, and honoring the lives of my stillborn twins. My husband and I attended their cremation and placed their beautiful little urns in a sacred place in our house.

2)     Listening: I took long walks and spent time in silence. I began to find Y-shaped branches in the woods and trails, and I took these as a sign of yes—of “keep going”—of somehow, somehow there would be a way to realize our dream of having children.

3)     Letting go of shame: In her much-viewed TED talk, psychologist and researcher Brene Brown said that shame is one of the most corrosive energies on the planet. After ten years of studying shame, she also discovered that there is an antidote, one that she sums up in four words: “You are not alone.” After my seven year journey and the groups I’ve been fortunate to speak with around the country since I wrote my book, I can say for certain, if you are going through a fertility crisis or trauma, you are not alone.

Researching my book, I read that one in six US births involved some sort of fertility procedure. A friend of my editor who also experienced a stillbirth started a Facebook group (Return to Zero) that within months had 115,000 followers.

The numbers were undeniable, but knowing the stats alone didn’t heal me. It was hearing the women and men who were experiencing similar pain that held the alchemy I needed. I could not sit in a room of people who had experienced what I had and feel the same hatred towards them that I had felt about myself (that I was impotent, not a woman, broken, a failure). These were not people who had done some unknown awful thing and were being punished by a fertility crisis. When I heard them speak, I felt overpowering love—and, as I loved, I softened to myself.  

A support group may not be the right solution for some, but the healing possibilities are infinite. We simply have to look until we find that thing that tells us in a way we can really feel that we are not alone, that the war will end.

After WWII, Winston Churchill said: “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” Some days, the only thing I could do was breathe, and continue.  A colleague friend of mine who teaches fertility and pre-natal yoga told me she believed there is a way for each person who wants to have a child.  I couldn’t believe her statement fully but I felt better and more open to possibility each time she said the words.

I believe there is some lifeline for each of us that can heal us and guide us forward as well. When we find ours, we have to grab it and tie it around our stomachs—and hold on tight until it leads us home- to the fulfillment of our dream. 

***

Thank you Sara for sharing your heartfelt journey from loss to joy. You will touch many with your story and give hope to all, especially those who struggle with infertility issues. 

How about you? Have you suffered a loss and triumphed?

A copy of Bringing in Finn will be given away to a lucky commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing.

We’d love to hear from you. Please leave your comments below~

Next Week:

Monday, 11/18/13:  “Growing into Country: A Memoir Moment.”

The winners of  Theo Nestor’s memoir, Writing is My Drink and Sara’s memoir will be announced on Monday’s blogpost.

 

 

Book Review, Memoir

WOW! Women on Writing Book Tour: A Review of Betty’s Child by Donald R. Dempsey

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Posted by Kathleen Pooler/@kathypooler

 

I am very pleased to be participating in WOW-Women on Writing’s Book Tour with this review of Donald R Dempsey’s stunning debut memoir, Betty’s Child.

 

Betty's Child Cover
Betty’s Child cover

 

Official book synopsis:

Donny Davis is struggling to coexist with his mother, a single woman who moves from place to place, always just a step ahead of the law, scamming churches, and running bad checks. She has already been incarcerated for these self-same illegal activities, but refuses to alter her lifestyle; a lifestyle that includes bringing home men she knows little or nothing about. One of these men eventually assaults Donny. He feels trapped, as his mother makes excuses for her boyfriend’s actions, but he fears more for his younger brothers than he does for himself. Scarred and sullen, Donny shamefully attends the church his mother is scamming. He stays silent, but something within him begins to rise up, and his youthful indignation swells to an outright full rebellion. As his life with his mother grows ever more fraught with peril, Donny’s world begins to completely unravel. His beloved dog is taken from him. One of his younger brothers is brutally attacked. He loses the few friends he has when the family is moved by the church they attend. And then, the very pastor who has control of them begins to accuse him of his mother’s sins.

 

Betty’s Child is the story of one young man’s ordeals with poverty, religion, physical and mental abuse, maternal insanity, and the dire need for confidence and direction as he attempts to come of age.

 

My Review:

 

Donald Dempsey writes with such piercing honesty and graphic scenic detail in this debut memoir that I had a hard time initially getting into his story. It wasn’t that his story was not engaging, it was that the subject matter was so painfully raw, it made me feel uncomfortable. How could a mother continually neglect and abuse her three sons to serve her own demented needs and furthermore, how could a preteen have the maturity, resilience and even a sense of humor to counteract her manipulations and insanity? As in Frank McCourt’s Angela’s Ashes, the reader can taste and feel the sense of poverty and despair as Donny struggles to grow and develop in an environment that is emotionally and physically-abusive not only as a result of his mother’s instability but also from the steady stream of undesirable men she brings home.

Through it all, I become increasingly more attached to Donny as a spunky twelve-year-old who is doing his best with what he has. His strength of character comes out in many ways as he navigates around the dangerous, drug-infested neighborhood , fighting off bullies. Donny serves as the protector for his younger brothers and learns to fend for himself, often skipping school and getting involved in stealing. A church member and his wife attempt to help Donny find God and although he resists, he ends up reluctantly participating in the rituals. The degree of insanity, neglect and abuse from his mother continues while she manipulates the church and its people to help support the family. This further enables her to continue in her scams and the neglect of her children. When Donny tries to confide his mother’s scamming habits to the pastor, the pastor sides with his mother and accuses Donny of being the instigator of his mother’s problems.

Dempsey recounts several horrific events with such passion and feelings of grief that I felt bereft and despairing right along with him. There is something within Donny’s character though that lurks in the background, a foreshadowing of hope for a better life someday. Donny’s character is resilient and resourceful and he shows a compassion and sense of humor that allows him to overcome any obstacle. He does not sugar-coat any of the abusive events he has had to face and he admits that some of the events in his life still have an impact on him. Rather he shows that despite even the most horrific circumstances, one can endure and go on to live a full and stable life.

Betty’s Child is an honest and believable portrait of what child abuse, neglect and poverty look and feel like to a child. It also delivers a message of hope and healing that one can overcome childhood abuse. The sensory details, authentic dialogue and honest reflections make this a gripping debut memoir.

5 out of 5 stars

 

Donald Dempsey with son Gavin (1)
Memoir Author Donald Dempsey with son Gavin

About the Author:

Don Dempsey experienced childhood abuse and neglect first hand, but went on to have a fulfilling family life as an adult and to own his own business. “If you’re lucky, you make it to adulthood in one piece,” says Don. “But there’s no guarantee the rest of your life is going to be any better. Abused kids are often plagued by fear and insecurity. They battle depression and have trouble with relationships. In the worst cases, abused children perpetuate the cycle.” But Don is living proof that you can overcome a childhood of abuse and neglect. “You start by letting go of as much of the guilt (yes, abused kids feel guilty) and as many of the bad memories as possible. At the same time, you hold on to the things that helped you survive. For me, it was the belief that you can make life better by working at it and earning it. It helps to have a sense of humor, too.”

 

Find out more about the author by visiting him online:Betty’s Child website: www.BettysChild.comDonald Dempsey Facebook: www.facebook.com/donald.dempsey.3

 

I’d love to hear from you. Please leave your comments below~

 

A Copy of Betty’s Child will be given to a commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing

 

 

 

Next Week: Memoir Author Grace Peterson will discuss her recently released memoir, Reaching in a guest interview:”Freedom From Spiritual Abuse.” She will give away a copy of her memoir to a commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing.