Posted by Kathleen Pooler /@kathypooler with Karen Leahy/@KCLeahy
“The convent became too tight a container for my life. I believe that many women have the equivalent of the “convent” in their lives—conditions that limit and diminish them, such as bad marriages or stifling jobs, and from which they must free themselves to live fuller lives. If my story gives them any sense of possibility that they too can change the course of their lives, can say Yes to their spirit’s cry for survival, I will be happy.” The Summer of Yes, page 6, Karen Leahy
I am very happy to feature Memoir Author Karen Leahy in this interview to discuss her recently released memoir, The Summer of Yes: An Ex-Nun’s Story. Karen and I met at the International Women Writer’s Guild (IWWG)’s annual summer conference at Drew University in August, 2013.
My reviews of her memoir can be found on Amazon and Goodreads.
Welcome, Karen!
KP: The Summer of Yes is a story of self-discovery and transformation as you take us on your journey into then out of the convent. When did you decide to write a memoir about this experience? What is the main message you hope to convey?
KL: I had avoided talking or even thinking about my convent years for decades after leaving. About 10 years ago, I wrote a few paragraphs about the convent in a writing workshop, and the floodgates opened. After I wrote the book, I put it away for a few years, unable to decide whether to actually publish it because a memoir leaves you so exposed. I finally decided to make it public because I felt I had a good story as well as a message to others: listen “to your spirit’s cry for survival” and take action.
KP: When I read your memoir, I was struck by your ability to convey your struggles in such an honest way. What was it like for you to face these struggles as you wrote your memoir?
KL: that It was painful at times, and I wrote some sections through tears, but it was also freeing. In the book, I tell of the “conspiracy of silence” that held sway in my family’s home and that followed me into the convent. I couldn’t express my feelings during all those years, and I was doing it in writing. Now I feel like a stronger, more “real” person. I never expected this result from writing the memoir, but am delighted with it.
KP: Most memoir writers have to face the fact that their version of the story may not coincide with others’ version of the same story. Did you find this to be an issue and if so, how did you handle it?
KL: I recognized that this was inevitably so. I say in the first chapter that my memory of events that happened decades ago is unreliable. But it’s MY story, told as honestly as I was able to tell it.
KP: We all have stories within to share but not all stories turn into a memoir that appeals to others. I found your memoir to be inspirational and enlightening. How did you turn your life events into a story that engages readers?
KL: I set out only to tell my story but found myself taking plenty of time to reflect on how it might help others. As I wrote, I began to see that the themes of surviving hardship and opening to a whole-hearted affirmation of life were part of the story, and I looked for words and images to convey these themes clearly.
KP: What made you decide to self-publish through Create Space?
KL: Well, being 71 was a big factor! I don’t have a lot of time to wait around for agents and publishers to choose my book, and then possibly several more years before it would come into print. A friend who had published through CreateSpace encouraged me, and voila!
KP: How do you plan to market your book?
KL: For me, writing the book was much easier than marketing. But I’m reading a lot of advice online, listening to what other writers have done and learning as I go. I’ll have a table at the Boston Book Festival on October 19 (come say hello to me in “Indie Row”), and I arranged for the Independent Book Publishers Association to represent my book at the Frankfurt (Germany) Book Fair, October 9-13. I’ve had a number of readings/book-signings, including a table at the IWWG conference in August, and plan to arrange more at book stores in major cities in the Northeast. I’m very grateful for opportunities such as this interview.
KP: Do you have any memoir writing tips to share?
KL: Number 1: START! Start anywhere, and try to keep your inner critic quiet as you let the first draft flow. Carry a small notebook with you and jot down memories and ideas that you might want to develop later. Don’t worry about structure at the beginning; you can play with that later. And be listening all along for what it is you really want to say. Courage!
***
Thank you, Karen for sharing your publishing journey with us. I especially appreciate your advice about taking time to reflect upon your story’s meaning to yourself and others and to keep writing past your inner critic.
Author Bio and contact information:
Karen Leahy is happy to be alive and publishing her first book at age 72. She is a senior editor at Dunton Publishing, freelance writer and editor and sometimes poet.
Since leaving the convent after 11 years as a Catholic nun and teacher of English and music, Karen has held positions as activist, speaker, vocalist, music teacher, assistant to prominent religious leaders and event planner. Though she has co-written short biographies for seniors to leave as legacies for their children and grandchildren, The Summer of Yes is her first full-length book.
An Ohio native, she now lives close enough to New York City to enjoy its arts & culture, food and energy with her cultured, food-loving boyfriend and spirited friends.
Follow Karen on her website/blog, www.karenleahy.com, on Facebook at Karen Leahy, and on Twitter @KCLeahy.
And if you are in Boston for the Boston Book Festival on October 19, 2013, be sure to stop by Karen’s table. She’ll be in front of the John Hancock Tower in a new Festival section for self-published authors called “Indie Row”
The Summer of Yes can be ordered from Amazon or from Karen’s website
How about you? Have you been reluctant to write your story, then found strength as you kept writing?
Karen has graciously offered to give away one copy of her memoir to a lucky commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing.
We’d love to hear from you. Please leave your comments below~
Friday, October 18: Denis Ledoux returns with the third session on Memoir Writing Tips: “Establish Your Setting.”
What an inspiring story, Karen and Kathy. I thought of Karen Armstrong right away. Perhaps you know her and her memoir the Spiral Staircase, Karen?
I like the advice you give about starting with fragments and worrying about structure later, Karen. I think I’ll pass that along to my students in the memoir class I’m teaching.
Thanks for your comments, Shirley. Yes, I know Karen Armstrong’s book. Though we share similar backgrounds, our stories are very different.
I agree, Shirley. Karen has many valuable memoir writing tips to share through her story. So glad you can relay this inspirational information to your students. Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts.
Dear Karen, Your story inspires many women to open up, find their voices and confront with honesty the issues and life events that have long haunted them. Congratulations on publishing your first book. We are never too old! Bravo! And, as a fellow author, who self-published through CreateSpace, I hear how important it is to be able to avail ourselves of a service that allows us to get on with it, produce a quality book and reach our audience. .
Well said, Susan! Congratulations to you, too, on your book.
Susan, Both you and Karen have shown us all how fortunate we are to have a wide array of publishing options to choose from. CreateSpace is on my list, behind a small publisher. Always nice to have a Plan B. I’m so happy you enjoyed Karen’s inspirational post. Thanks for stopping by.
Yes indeed, that “conspiracy of silence” does get around, doesn’t it? (Insert wry smile here) I am moved by your willingness to share your story, and I relate wholeheartedly to that reticence to put it out there. That’s just where I am now. How much do I really want to show; how much is important to show? But, I also know that as each of us shares our truth, we give strength to others to do the same. Thank you for sharing your strength.
I totally agree that we can give strength to each other as we share our stories.The decision of “how much do I really want to show” is a hard one. I’d say follow your deepest instincts. And don’t feel guilty about keeping some things private. I look forward to your book!
Thank you, Karen. I must say, I’m looking forward to it too. 🙂
Your comments resonate with me,Janet. The whole idea of what to keep, what to leave out can be a daunting reality of memoir writing. In the end, as you say, we need to “share our truth” which Karen does with grace, courage and clarity as an inspiration for all of us. I love your comment ” as each of us shares our truth, we give strength to others to do the same.” Amen! Best wishes in getting your memoir out there,too. We’re waiting patiently! 🙂
thank you, Kathy. I dare say, “what to leave out” is not only daunting, it’s been, for me, the single hardest part of crafting this book. I remember too many d*** details and they are, actually, not that interesting. Once I remember that, it does get easier.
I so love the liveliness of your commenters. And, so glad you are back.
Thanks,Janet. This is a great community and I’m so happy you are a part of it. I love your no-nonsense approach. LOL, if we put ourselves to sleep with all those d*** details, surely the reader will suffer as well. There is wisdom in the “write tight” rule. 🙂
I can well relate to your opening comment: “The convent became too tight a container for my life.” I suppose two of the choices for those that feel a constriction like this are these: To sing as a caged bird or to fly out to freedom, much more appealing. Like Janet, I am grappling with what and how much to reveal. Like you, I have had to keep the inner critic quiet as I write. And like you, I am getting a late start.
Because of Shirley’s comment, I pulled out my copy of Karen Armstrong’s The Spiral Staircase and noted that she also had to climb out of the darkness of the terrifying illness of epilepsy, undiagnosed for years. You just can’t keep a good woman down.
Karen, I admire your courage, persistence, and accomplishment as you ascend the staircase to success. Best wishes at the Boston Book Festival this weekend.
Thanks, Marian. Don’t worry about a late start. Just think: you have more wisdom to impart now!
Dear Marian,
I’m in the same boat , “getting a late start” BUT ( and it’s what comes after the but that counts) the most important thing is that we started writing and we’ll keep writing until it’s right. Besides, think of all the wisdom that the lived experience adds to our stories! So nice to have you stop by and share your thoughts on Karen’s excellent post. Thanks!
Like what Karen says about taking the time to reflect on how her book would help others. For me, this is the essence of a good memoir. It’s not easy to open up about deeply personal issues after decades of silence – I don’t know if I could do it – and I applaud Karen for slaying this dragon. How many of us carry the burden of unresolved issues for all of our lives? Also, Karen is an inspiration to us older writers who are hoping to publish our memoirs/books.
Go for it, Penelope!
Hi Penelope, How nice to have you stop by! Welcome and thank you for your insights. I agree with your comments about how difficult exposing deeply personal experiences can be. Karen shows us the way and inspires us all to believe in our stories and in our voices, regardless of our age. Thanks for stopping by!
Kathy, thank you for interviewing Karen. Karen, I enjoyed reading about your self publishing decision to use Create Space for getting your memoir into the hands of readers sooner. I am 70 and am encouraged by your story. I like your concluding remark, “And be listening all along for what it is you really want to say.”
My pleasure, Barbara. I’m so happy you found inspiration and encouragement from Karen’s story. Thanks for stopping by,
Kathy, thank you for having Karen as a guest…what a beautiful and inspirational interview.
I especially relate to, “I set out only to tell my story but found myself taking plenty of time to reflect on how it might help others. As I wrote, I began to see that the themes of surviving hardship and opening to a whole-hearted affirmation of life were part of the story, and I looked for words and images to convey these themes clearly.”
Speaks volumes to me as I found myself in a dark valley of writing that I couldn’t see until I was able to understand how my story may help others. My purpose in writing isn’t just to share lessons learned but to also encourage others and to remind them that they are not alone.
Thank you Ladies. And thank you for the opportunity to win a signed copy of The Summer of Yes. Sounds fabulous…
Write On Ladies!
Dear Rhonda, It’s my pleasure to feature Karen and her inspirational story. I love your comment, “my purpose in writing isn’t just to share lessons learned but to also encourage others and to remind them they are not alone.” I feel strongly that connecting with our purpose for writing is a prerequisite to doing justice to our stories.Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts.
Barbara, in the end, I was glad I took a long time from start to finish because the book had time to “percolate,” to let the essential themes become clear to me. I look forward to your story!
Congratulations, Karen! I’m from Cincinnati. Where in Ohio did you live?
As a non-Catholic, I have often wondered what motivates someone to become a nun. Your memoir sounds like it would be an interesting read. Paige