Posted by Kathleen Pooler/@kathypooler with Nancy Sharp/@BoldLivingNow
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break.” William Shakespeare
I am thrilled to feature Keynote Speaker and Author Nancy Sharp in this Google+ Interview about her memoir, Both Sides Now: A True Story of Love, Loss, and Bold Living. This powerful memoir is about giving love and life your all then moving on with grace and strength to build a new life after loss and grief. It is a stunning tribute to the beauty of love and the resilience of the human spirit.
My reviews can be found on Amazon, Goodreads, Shelfari and LibraryThings.
Both Sides Now has recently been selected for The 2014 National Indie Excellence Award in the grief and loss category:
and The 2014 International Book Awards Winner:
Synopsis:
The past is simply part of our story; just not the whole story...On the very day that Nancy Sharp delivered premature twins, she learned that her husband’s brain cancer returned after eighteen months in remission. Less than three years later, at the age of 37, she became a widow. But while many in that situation would crumble, Nancy had an innate ability to hold life and death in the same moment. She learned to “see beyond the frame’s edge.” In BOTH SIDES NOW: A True Story of Love, Loss, and Bold Living, Nancy shares her unforgettable journey – one that offers enlightened understanding for living life to the fullest. Her story is a gift to those looking to lift themselves from the embers of loss and adversity through bold living.
Welcome, Nancy!
Memoir Author Nancy Sharp on Her New Memoir, Both Sides Now:
KP: Both Sides Now is a very raw and personal story of loss and renewal. What made you decide to write your story as a memoir?
NS: It had to take this form in order to render my experience as authentically as possible. That said, writing the story took time, because, well, seeing takes time, healing takes time. I had already processed my husband Brett’s death, but the writing process required me to distill particular moments (scenes) that would best serve the narrative. Brett’s illness was a long one – nearly seven years from diagnosis until his death. No one wants to read about all the trials and tribulations of those seven years, or of the period of mourning that followed. Readers comment on the rawness of the writing in Both Sides Now. And yet I had to be emotionally detached in order to write. After all, this isn’t just my story. It’s everyone’s story. Because loss–no matter how narrow or broadly you define it–is universal. Both Sides Now is the giveback of loss, my own loss, and yet I wrote it as a gift for others.
KP: How long did it take you to find your story?
NS: I first started to write the memoir following more of a traditional narrative using longish chapters and more of a straight chronological format. I wrote several chapters but felt stifled by my own words. I needed breathing space. Then it hit me that if I felt this way, surely my readers would need breathing space as well. Time to pause and reflect upon their own stories. I came to see that I needed to write the book in fragments because that is the way of healing. There is nothing linear about the process. Similarly, we needed white space to process and dream. The entire process was an evolution; I’d say it took a good three years to tackle the writing.
KP: Can you describe your writing process?
NS: Fits and starts with lots of 5 a.m. wake-ups in order to claim quiet time before getting my twins ready for school. I love the stillness of early morning.
KP: You wrote Both Sides Now is short chapters and you refer to your first husband Brett in the second person, as “you”. After he dies, you change to the third person. What made you decide to use that structure and those points of view?
NS: I addressed the short chapters and fragments above, but yes, I did in fact alter the voice throughout the course of the book. Here’s why. Writing about Brett in the second person draws readers into our world in a very intimate fashion; they are right there with us, experiencing the wild swings of joy and sorrow. But when he dies, I felt that the third person would create necessary distance and perspective.
KP: What are your memoir takeaways, the message you most want to reach your readers?
NS: No matter what obstacles life presents… you must find ways to move forward. That is the gift of bold living.
KP: Can you describe your path to publication?
NS: The publishing process is a very slippery slope. I do have a literary agent who did a terrific job trying to pitch the book to many different houses. She received letter after letter complimenting the writing and the power of the narrative, but alas, none of these traditional publishing houses leapt at the chance to acquire Both Sides Now. Just because people like – even love – a story, doesn’t guarantee a book deal. There are so many extraneous factors involved. Had we persisted with smaller houses, I’m confident that the book would have been acquired. But then several friends of mine who are professional speakers urged me to retain control of the book, so that I would have the ability to reprint copies for years to come and not be beholden to a publishing house that might not do this (as is very customary). In addition to using my written voice, I use my speaking voice to reach others, delivering programs on loss, faith, second acts and bold living to a variety of groups. It was one of my MFA graduate mentors who introduced me to Mitchell Kaplan, founder of Books & Books and the Miami Book Fair International. He is also past president of the American Booksellers Association. Mitchell decided to publish the book under Books & Books Press, an independent publishing house. I’ve been very happy with the arrangement.
KP: Do you have any memoir writing tips to share?
NS: Writers must be exceedingly patient and flexible in order to visualize the right way to tell their stories. Experiment with structure and voice. Play with different forms. Reflect upon theme using a multi-sensory approach. Do these things and eventually you will discover the best way to render your story.
Thank you Nancy for sharing your memoir writer’s journey with us. I appreciate your practical points about writing a memoir. Your story has touched many people in a healing and hopeful way. Best wishes for your ongoing success reaching more readers.
Author Bio:
Nancy Sharp is a writer and keynote speaker who frequently talks to large groups about loss, renewal, and bold living. She holds a MFA in Creative Nonfiction from Goucher College and writes regularly for The Huffington Post, and for numerous online media, national magazines, and regional newspapers. Nancy authors two blogs: Vivid Living: Life in Full Bloom…Thorns and All®, and Tasting Life with Nancy Sharp. Nancy lives in Denver with her husband, Steve Saunders, and their four children, ages thirteen through twenty-three. Learn more at NancySharp.net.
Author Contact Information:
How about you? Have you experienced a major loss and found healing in writing about it?
Nancy has graciously agree to give away a copy of her memoir to a commenter whose name will be selected in a random drawing.
We’d love to hear from you. Please leave your comments below~
This Week:
I’m over at Marian Beaman’s Plan and Fancy Girl blog with a guest post: “Kathy Pooler and Independence Day: Her Story of Freedom.” Hope you’ll stop by and leave a comment!
Thursday: 05/29/14: “My Writing Process Tour”
Next Week:
Monday, 06/02/14: “The 3 P’s of Publishing a Memoir.”
Halfway there and 81% funded!
My Pubslush Crowdfunding Campaign for my memoir, Ever Faithful to His Lead: My Journey Away From Emotional Abuse ends at midnight on June 11. This week I’m offering a special time limited award of a decorative journal to the first ten people who either contribute for the first time or for backers who can answer this question on Facebook or via email:
“When have you chosen to move on and not repeat your mistakes?”
By making a contribution you will help spread the messages of hope, resilience and courage to those seeking freedom from abuse. Here’s the link to the campaign:
http://pubslush.com/books/id/2076.
If you are unable to make a contribution, I’d love it if you would share this link with others.
Please join me in sharing the hope!
Thank you.